Nintendo’s Disappointing GDC Showing
Though some of you may never guess it with the way I’m always obnoxiously negative regarding the Wii, I was a faithful believer in Nintendo for a long period of time. With my first console being the NES, I had no choice but to get an early start. The years passed. I enjoyed my Mario, my Pokémon, and my various Zeldas and Metroids, though I wasn’t by any means a Nintendo fangirl. I gave my paramours some love, as well, getting in some Sonic and Tempo and then later on even some Mystic Midway. Now, these days I’m more embarrassed than anything when I see the iconic logo.
Satoru Iwata’s keynote “rocked” some lucky attendees to GDC’s worlds, and I have to be honest here – there wasn’t a thing about any of the announcements that tickled my fancy whatsoever. Instead, I kept thinking – “This is what everyone’s been waiting for? These announcements are what everyone is scrambling to report?” Then again, if an image of Shigsy wiping his ass with the insane amounts of money he’s made were flashed onscreen to visitors, then I’m sure that would receive mondo coverage as well.
If you aren’t one of those overzealous gamers who researches every single little tidbit of news that surfaces regarding major conventions, let me sum some of the ZOMGHUEGANNOUNCEMENTS up for you. Brace yourselves – they’re freaking SWEET.
A “solution” to the Wii’s storage woes was announced.
Not already aware? Now you can download up to 250 WiiWare/Virtual Console titles straight to an SD card (up to 32 GB) and then play them off of the card. While this may seem SUPER AMAZING to some, you still can’t play saves off the card. So what good is this, again?
New Zelda!
This time, Link is riding a train, you guys! Woo, woo!
Climb virtual rocks!
That’s right – now you can climb a virtual rockwall via the Wii’s Balance Board. Riveting.
More Final Fantasy re-issues, My Life as a Demon LordIf you hadn’t played the original Final Fantasies before now, you can now play one of the umpteenth remakes coming to the Wii Shop channel. However, noteworthy is a sequel to Final Fantasy IV. The rest of the Final Fantasy news for Nintendo was severely lacking.
Oh yeah – more arcade titles via the Virtual Arcade
…Because no one has emulators, and everyone has 400 Wii Points to drop on tired old arcade titles that are available all across the internet.
You catch my drift? Now, after everything was said and done, I am continually feeling that Nintendo is becoming more and more out of touch with announcements that are actually important. Why is any of this any type of news? It’s not. Perhaps I’m just needlessly complaining now, but does anyone else feel the way I do? Not about Vera, but about Nintendo’s showing and GDC altogether?
Really disappointed with the continuation of Zelda stylus. Urgh, classic style plaz.
Zelda was the only thing that remotely interested me at their keynote and I wasn’t even a massive fan of the Phantom Hourglass.
A sequel to FF4
Zelda was the only thing that remotely interested me at their keynote and I wasn’t even a massive fan of the Phantom Hourglass.
A sequel to FF4 is cool but come on! Give me a fucking remake of Final Fantasy 7 now please!!
Nintendo will do what they have always done, ignore technology, fuck third party developers and milk the nostalgia cow until it’s teats fall off. Failing that, they’ve got a whole new business of selling white, functionless boxes to housewives and 6-year-olds. Eventually even the hardcore fanboys will grow tired of it and they’ll realise that when all your profits are based on fads, they’ll go up really quickly but won’t last forever. In a couple of years, the Wii will hit market saturation and they’ll find that they now control a market which doesn’t care about graphics and only buys 1 game a year. Then what? A HD Wii that no-one wants? Desperate attempts ram another gimmicky controller down our throats? They’ve shafted the hardcore for the sake of short term games but the people who are buying Wiis don’t care about Mario or Zelda, they play wii sports and wii fit and then let the fucker gather dust. Abandon ship, Nintendo fanboys and let’s hope captain reggie goes down with it.
At least they weren’t thoroughly making fools of themselves.
Screw Final Fantasy 7. Damn it to the bowels of hell. Yay for new sequel though.