Cloud Buys Lara Croft: Square Enix to Take Over Eidos
In a move that I can only hope will result in people referring to Square Enix as Squeenixdos, it looks like the venerable JRPG developer/angst ridden teen production plant will indeed be buying up Eidos. According to MCV, the transition will happen in the next few weeks and Eidos will be left as an independent development house, which implies that jobs on the Eidos side are more or less safe.
Having said that, there is definitely a difference between the implication that everyone will keep bringing home the bacon, and actually following through. Takeovers, even non-hostile ones, can be messy sometimes. But hopefully those crazy Brits living in the house that Lara built will be alright.
Now on the surface this may not seem like terribly important news. It’s not like they’ve announced that Eidos will be relocated to Japan or anything crazy. Basically all this means is that the people working at Eidos will now get their pay cheques from the other side of the planet and will have to commit seppuku if they let any game assets leak early.
However, wouldn’t it be awesome if they did some crazy-ass crossover project? Like, Hitman meets Star Ocean, meets Parasite Eve? Except it’s like, set in the past? And there’s like, this dinosaur scientist that’s trying to take over the world using Chocobos, and Aya Brea needs to team up with Agent 47 to use technology given to them by Claude Kenni (Original Star Ocean) to fight him?
Oh, and they could throw lady Crofts boobs in there somewhere.
Awesome.
I would pay good money for a Lara Croft / Aya Brea / Tifa Lockhart team up. Maybe we should be sending crossover ideas to Squeenixdos to stop them pumping out countless sequels to Final Fantasy 7.
That would be bad-ass, but why stop there. They should take all the leading ladies from all of their combined licenses and make a dating sim. That shit would cause Japans economy to grind to a halt from people staying home from work.
A sequel to Just Cause featuring Cloud with the motorbike, swords and all the moves he had in Advent Children would also be acceptable.
I’m picturing the Just Cause 2 now, Cloud skydiving out of Highwind (in slo mo of course) before landing on his bike and speeding of into the sunset. That would be awesome.